I don’t care if you don’t want to wear a helmet while riding a motorcycle, even though I would. You’ll only hurt yourself.

I don’t care if you don’t want to wear your seat-belt while in a car, even though I always do. You’ll only hurt yourself.

What I do care about is the idiots that take to the road after throwing back a few too many tequila shots. They could hurt me and those that I love, and I’m just not okay with that.

I’m not the world’s most perfect driver, but there is no way that I’ll put others in danger by making the idiotic mistake of getting behind the wheel not sober.

On Monday night, we were at our friends’ house grilling out with a few other people. We decided to skip out early and not go to the fireworks since Tuesday was a work-day and it was an hour drive home.

Traffic wasn’t too bad, but as we kept nearing the last town before our own, the number of cars picked up as well as the reckless maneuvers that could only be explained by drunkenness.

The main highway is a two-lane highway that curves and curves, rarely allowing any cars the opportunity to pass the slowers ones. Trust me, I’ve been stuck behind many, many, many, many of these slower ones. It’s also really the only straight shot to get home.

While driving along this highway, moving with the flow of traffic, a four-door tin can comes speeding up behind me, only to pass me and barely miss the oncoming car and my front bumper. The car was filled with 4 guys, looking to be about 18 or 19, with the back two passengers turning around to stare at me.

I yelled a few expletives and flashed gang symbols at them, making them fear for their lives. Or maybe not. It was dark. Hard to tell.

Of course, as soon as we passed a cop strategically hidden along the side of the road, this car obeyed every single traffic law…except for tailgating.

Cop doesn’t flinch.

Eventually this a-hole car turns off to find their perfect viewing area, only to be replaced by an even more disturbing a-hole.

We finally made it through this last town and were on the last stretch toward home when we were held up by a car going 30. In a 55. With a steady stream of oncoming traffic, leaving me no other choice other than to just follow behind.

Up behind me comes another speeding car. While riding my back bumper, this car dramatically swerves into oncoming traffic not once, but four different times, almost hitting me and the other car heading straight for it. Once the a-hole saw the headlights, he’d swerve over to avoid getting hit, going so far at to be driving on completely past the far edge of the rumble strip.

Anytime there was a turn lane, he’d try to pass me in it.

Seriously, dude? You realize that I’m not the one going so slow, right?

The kicker is: we passed another strategically placed cop in the passing lanes (aka the one opportunity to get around the slow-poke). Nothing once again.

The a-hole had whipped around me before the passing lane even started and then took off. His recklessness purely astounded me.

I tried to catch him (once I passed the cop) and I was gaining no ground on him when I was going 70.

There’s one stoplight in our town and it came to be very helpful in my journey to catch this dude. Driving like that only saved him about 7 seconds. In fact, I was able to follow him almost all the way to his house without his knowledge.

Because he lives in my neighborhood.

So, I am writing to you, the Reckless A-Hole of My Town: the very apparent drunk driver who almost ran me off the road four times.

What the hell is wrong with you?

I’m just glad there were no passengers in your car. I can only hope that you never have passengers in your car when you make this stupid decision again, which I’m sure you inevitably will.

Drunk driving is never okay, D-bag.


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